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Last night I went to walmart for some basic groceries at 9pm
I usually shop late to avoid crowds but last night for whatever reason every family with their crying offspring was there.
I lasted about 10 minutes before I have to left
I can't deal with this much more I think social anxiety is stupid but I cant help it
crowds can be tiring. I went to a local festival alone and felt very apart from the people. That they are with another, laugh , talk, join in. I wandered around, the local young police on hand to punish the breaking of a rule and do the mean crowds bidding.
I don't think social anxiety is stupid, but if it has reached a point in you that you don't think you can bare it then you must look for a thing that will give you some fortitude to face it.
Being reclusive allows a person to control more of their environment, but I'm not sure it's the answer. Unless you have a lovely house and garden. The company of birds and insects can be more understanding than the fear that groups of people induce through such triviality it would make me scream.
I for one hold the anonymous local crowd to account for my mistreatment and project my unforgivable and vengeful mood on them.
That's why you get a psychiatrist's opinion at best, or at least a therapist's. Everyone's neurochemistry and specific needs of depression are different, and even "basic" anti-depressants can have unwanted side-effects and complications — not to mention that determining your specific dosage is critical, and takes time.
I am saying this as someone on sertraline with middling efficacy for the past 5-6 years, and vicarious experiences beyond that. If I can't stop you, /please/ at least do your heavy research beforehand, and potentially check out sites like erowid or 420chan.
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I take these it's p good, I just believe in them as hard as I can so I at least get placebo
Smoke weed too my man
Just not too much or you'll become psychologically dependent and lose all of the good parts of being human
Has the prodigal Chris returned?
Tell us of your travelers oh weary one
There were many things and much revelation, and while I have shored up against my ruins still I am defeated in my lifetime.
In itself it does not matter though I still hope for a legacy that surpasses my misfortune. Then I may provide solace for those that meet a similar fate.
I do not think this is a bad aim, but one that puts some use to my life that financial accounting would never have done despite the comforts it would have given me.
there are many paths
It really won't. Sure it will make you feel good for awhile but the weed will just make you paranoid an anxious
How long have you been depressed?
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"Also worthy of mention is a clique among the suicidal for whom the meaning of their act is a darker thing. Frustrated as perpetrators of an all-inclusive extermination, they would kill themselves only because killing it all is closed off to them. They hate having been delivered into a world only to be told, by and by, “This way to the abattoir, Ladies and Gentlemen.” They despise the conspiracy of Lies for Life almost as much as they despise themselves for being a party to it. If they could unmake the world by pushing a button, they would do so without a second thought. There is no satisfaction in a lonesome suicide. The phenomenon of “suicide euphoria” aside, there is only fear, bitterness, or depression beforehand, then the troublesomeness of the method, and nothingness afterward. But to push that button, to depopulate this earth and arrest its rotation as well—what satisfaction, as of a job prettily done. This would be for the good of all, for even those who know nothing about the conspiracy against the human race are among its injured parties."
– Thomas Ligotti
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__She gave of the child.__
Down, free as memory, they
with the man lingered.
"Away, Sara, away!"
The healthiest echoed it over.
Tightly, it robed the conversations.
I'm nothing all in clothes.
that's a really nice painting
lesley oldaker is it? took me some searching to find it
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thank you for putting in the work for me anon