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I pray that you find somebody better and treat you better as well.
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things are getting better. only about a year left of school before i can transfer to get my bachelors. have enough savings that i don't need to work until then. been taking nice long walks, enjoying nature. slowly but surely selling off 95% of my belongings before i have to leave. it's sort of solemn, but also freeing. even if things don't work out, at least i know each day i'm actively planning to make life better for my future-self.
"I'll be dead by 30. lol."
- Me at 18, 17, 16…
"I'll be dead by 30. lol"
- Me now
I'm pretty close to achieving my goals I set for myself as a kid. I've done the things that were bothering me as a kid. Finished most of the games I never was able to do, achieved most of my academic goals that I thought I would never be able to accomplish, and actually got a job in my field for about a month. If I'm able to get another job, regardless, I'll have completed everything me as a kid though I would never have done. I didn't have much faith in myself, so it's nothing special. I'm not talking about getting an advanced degree. Just things that I never would have thought I could achieved. Thanks to the support system I have, of course. I feel like a bit of a fraud compared to others, but in retrospect, those ideas and philosophy system is my enemy.