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No. 1 [Reply]

Mental and Physical Health.

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No. 211 [Reply]

Bottling only makes it harder.
This thread is intented for people who would like to rant and write out their feelings.

It's possible to just spill everything in the textbox, explain it detailed or even write poems/haikus or stories, whatever your want.
You can give yourself a time- or character limit if you feel overwhelmed with writing down all that is going on.
You may also ask for advice or similiar.


It's hard to keep up a happy face, don't hide under a mask in order to lie to yourself.
Be honest with yourself and your feelings, that's the first step towards self improvement.
132 posts and 49 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.480

>>477
haha same
i really don't know what to do…

No.481

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>>479
Hell yeah I can
>>477
I don't know if there's any single, definitive way. I guess you should learn to recognize when you're going to have those thoughts, and have some kind of "disruptor." Sing a song in your head, or something like that. I'm not a therapist, tho.

No.483

Lately, some things that I've been working on and off of the past six months or so are about to come to an end. I don't know what I want to feel about said events. I do know that in the past when these have happened, I've done enough to satisfy myself with the results and even then, I always know I could have done better. I know it's a really small minded-thing to focus on this as a determinant of my worth, but I think the attitude leading up to it really reflect my worst traits.

I'm lazy, easily distracted, and not dedicated. I've had tons of time and even then I only half-ass it, and that's at the last second too. I tell myself, "Oh, I'm too tired to get anything done, so I'll go to bed." And in the morning, when I wake up, I look at the calendar and tell myself that I have so much time, that I don't need to worry about putting some time in for my own enjoyment because I have time to spare. With every time these events(or even any sort of time crunch passes me by) I am always reminded of what a weak minded, shitty and undeserving person that I am. I don't even deserve the place in life that I have right now. There are people who I know that work far harder than me and yet are still in a worse position. On the flip side, I know that I'll never be able to muster up the dedication to make myself truly great. I listen to how people say that they've put in so much dedication to one thing, and I get motivated for a few days and it just escapes me.

No.484

>>483 (cont'd)
Another thing that really bothers me as well is that I could have put myself in a far better position had I really cared. If I were a better version of myself, more outgoing, more efficient and dedicated, I could easily and confidently say that I deserve this, and more. But I am not that person. I see it in others everyday and my family and friends comment about it, saying I hold X(a close friend) in such high regard that I look up to him in everything. And it's true. I do idolize him, even though he has flaws of his own, I can't seem to be even as half as dedicated or efficient as him. He makes it look easy.

My fears for the future are that I will eventually slip and my shortcomings will be revealed to everyone. Not that they haven't heard me talk about it, but rather they will understand that I truly do not deserve any praise or congratulations.

No.486

>>483
>>484
I guarantee you're being too hard on yourself. I don't think anyone really deserves anything; so much of it is down to genetics and upbringing after all.


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No. 482 [Reply]

Anyone trying to lose weight?

What are you doing? Any progress?

I'm thinking of picking up fasting for at least a month.

No.485

>>482
no sugar, no carbs
not a 'diet', just the easiest way to eat fewer calories
eat yogurt and meat and shit
I stopped eating sugar to help with my acne and I accidentally lost 6kgs in 3 weeks


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No. 462 [Reply]

Most of the time I'm a pretty reserved and quiet person. I can be kinda awkward at times but I'm not a complete sperg. I think one of my biggest issues is I just never know what to say which leads to a conversation that fizzles out and dies really fucking quick.

I want to become a better conversationalist
How do i get better at talking to people irl
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

No.466

>>464
I do try to do this but sometimes I struggle to think of questions to even ask. Or Ill ask a question, theyll answer, and say something like uhuh thats interesting… then the convo dies sometimes cause I dont have another followup

No.467

>>465
I don't mind, as long as it helps you we're all good.
invite me on discord joão#8767

No.468

So did you two end up talking? I'm just curious.

No.469

>>468
Not yet. I'm lazy and a coward so I never reached out to him. Why should I bother to do hard work on improving myself when I can just fap to porn and play videogames

No.471

>>469
I don't think this is the right attitude to have, anon!
You should try, at least once!
Here, have mine, in case you change your mind and want to improve yourself : Eidolon#3693


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No. 355 [Reply]

Anyone have any experience with antidepressants here? I'm getting so desperate I'm willing to try anything.
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No.361

SSRIs will fuck you. They are a scam. They don't help, but you become dependent on them and you have to keep spending money on them. They mess up your whole brain chemistry. Most drugs that actually help with depression are ignored because they end up classed as recreational. There are studies which show that psilocybin and ketamine are effective against depression. Psilocybin would probably be a better place to start, since ketamine can be habit forming so I'd recomend that if psilocybin doesn't help.

No.362

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>>359
>they will deprive you of certain rights, use the fact that you've been on anti-depressants before against you in court (it goes on a public "permanent record" sort of thing)

Could you provide a source on that? I did some searches for "anti-depressants/SSRIs permanent record", "anti-depressants/SSRIs used as evidence in court", and a few other permutations but I couldn't find anything that matched up with what you're saying.

No.403

>>362
I'm not motivated enough to find a source, but whenever you hear the talking point that the mentally ill should not be allowed to have guns, that's because if you've been on medication in many states you will not be allowed to purchase them, as many anti-depressant medications are also explicit anti-psychotic medications.

No.405

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I forgot all about this thread, here's an update if anyone is interested.
I've been taking 10mg of prozac daily since late June. After a month of that I went back to the doctor and she prescribed abilify in supplement to the prozac. I never went out and got any abilify (partly due to depression/anxiety and also due to my fears of all these meds). That doctor stopped working at that office and a month or so later I met with another doctor who recommended that I up my dose of prozac to 20mg daily. I said nah I think 10 is fine for now. Idk why I really said that, I havn't felt different at all since I started taking this shit. Not even any side effects or anything I feel pretty much exactly the same. I wasn't expecting a drastic change to my personality or anything but damn Is this all just a big meme?

I still feel like a big loser and I fucking hate myself and only leave the house to go to work or go see a movie like once a month.
The only real tangible difference I can identify is that I no longer despise my job or going to work long ass shifts. Idk if this is due to the drug or just me being there long enough that I've simple accepted it and learned to bear it.

Anyways I'm gonna try shrooms with a college who has said it helped him with his depression over the coming winter so hopefully that will help me out a bit.

No.460

>>405
did you end up doing it, anon?


No. 438 [Reply]

I saw a short interview with the actor who played Barney the Dinosaur the other day. I know it sounds ridiculous but I can't stop thinking about it. Here's a guy with probably one of the shittiest jobs I can imagine and he's just radiating happiness while talking about it. Imagine being in that giant suit, having to dance around for hours probably to kiddie music, the studio lights beaming down on you, you can barely see anything and you're sweating like crazy. But this guy has nothing but positive things about the experience, in fact he says he "loved" being Barney. Most people who do costume work only do it to move up to something better but this guy played Barney for TEN YEARS. He even loves the annoying "I love you" song that Barney sings which he's probably had to listen to thousands of times over the years.

I can't stop thinking about how positive and happy this guy is. I'm such a aggressive, pessimistic, stressed-out person. If I had a job like that, I would probably complain about it all the time. I wish I could be like him and see it as nothing but pure joy. I want whatever he has. In the video, he mentions that he studies Tantra and regularly did meditation. Do you think that's the key to becoming calm and content like he is? Or is that just who he is as a person?

No.459

Some people simply live their façade of normalcy. Like, for whatever reason they can't even entertain negative thoughts. A job requiring constant positivity would just reinforce this behavior with the added spur of financial gain.

Saccharine shit like singing the same happy song over and over again just helps them feel validated within their delusions of everything being perfect. It's an interesting psychological survival strategy but it leaves you unaware of your own issues until you crash into them headfirst.


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No. 263 [Reply]

Why do I have no discipline?
Why can't I do anything?
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No.354

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Because you don't believe that you can. Yes, it's a cliche. Yes it's unhelpful; it is still true. I used to feel exactly the same way as you did, as though my life was on rails and completely out of my control. I had vague ideas of things that I thought I might want, but never for a moment believed that they would be achievable or could actually happen.
It may not surprise you to hear that I was very depressed for some time; ironically, it was when it got unbearable that I set myself free, completely by accident. I bought some heroin and lots of valium off the darknet with the aim of downing a bottle of vodka and dieing (inb4 not the most effective method, yada yada yada).
And then it occurred to me. Just sitting in despair in my room living off handouts, I could get access to some of the most powerful drugs the world has ever known delivered straight to my door. Isn't that crazy? Imagine what I could do if I put my mind to it!
Look the point of all this is that you need to embrace the absurdity. Chase a whale. Push a boulder up a hill. Smoke some rocks. Just do <something>, for Christs sake. Not something you never thought you could do, because you'll mentally block yourself from doing it. Do something entirely new, that is entirely unlike you.
It could be as simple as getting dessert.

No.365

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>>263
I feel man. Every time I want to get into something new or study a subject, after some time I lose interest and drive to ever look at it again.
I've fallen so many times into this spiral of apathy and despair.

No.374

I don't have discipline unless I have stress and pressure. So if I was to guess for you anon its probably the same. Just give yourself something to stress over and a deadline to hit it.

No.450

I was just about to post this exact same topic.

>354

This is really true. I think I was just born a POS garbage person and don't think I can change it. Like when I think about "people who exercise" or "organized people" and wish I was like them…it just seems impossible and well, I'm not *one of those people*. I'm a garbage person.

How do I stop believing this?

No.451

>>450
just know that you can change, but it will take a conscious, sometimes grueling, effort. force yourself to learn small habits. go for a walk every morning, or put things back where they belong. over time, these good habits will overtake your old, bad ones and be easier to stick to.


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No. 435 [Reply]

Hello, my friends.

For a while now I have had the assumption that I, personally, perceive the state of "feeling touched / moved" as more extreme than other people, though I have no idea why that might be.
The best example for this is whenever my dear mom passionately tells me about things she has done, for instance crafting some decoration, how proud she is of the outcome and that she'd like to show me. I perceive this as really cute and am extremely moved every time, but this "aww"-feeling seems more like sadness than anything else and one time even caused me to have some sort of emotional breakdown. One where I was crying for 2 hours straight, and I didn't even know what for - I still don't, in fact. This can't be entirely normal, can it?

My mom is the person I love most in this world, so then why do I feel so sad at times where her happiness shines through the most? Does it subconsciously remind me that I won't have her around forever? Maybe it reminds me of times when I wasn't good to her and I feel more grief now whenever I see how nice of a person and thus how undeserving she was of bad things that happened in the past?

Maybe some anons here have had similar experiences - if so, please tell us! Or maybe all of this really is normal after all and this is just what feeling moved is all about.

No.436

It can be """normal""" if you are an introvert. Because introverts can be more intense with feelings when they are real.

Daydreaming imagining your mom dead and how you could've been a better person to your family or close friends and whatever, happens sometimes inside the mind of introverts, because they fantasize too much.

But if it's been occurring for a long time, all the time, it might be depression.

I was used to feel this way almost everyday, but it's getting better. Start to exercise, you can run, jump, ride a bike or something. I promise you're gonna feel better.

No.437

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>>435
this is pretty much how I feel when I'm finally coming out of a long period of depression. i get emotional over the smallest things, even to the verge of tears sometimes. but i usually readjust and things level out after about a week or so.

No.444

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Seems like you are just a sensitive person – those who can experience deep sadness can also experience the mirrored deep happiness (awe, meaning, etc.). Crying for 2 hours may seem like a long time, but perhaps there was some unexpressed pain you had to let out.

I have cried at paintings, sunlight glinting on a body of water, a sunset seen from a plane, seeing people gathered and relaxed all together in one place. This is the gamut of human experience.

No.445

>>437
Same here (but for shorter periods).

For me it also seems to happen if I notice oncoming depression but manage to avoid the spiral of negative thoughts, which I guess leaves me still biochemically fucked up for a while but not sad.


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No. 270 [Reply]

How many of you guys are hikkis? It is not something I am proud of personally, yet, it's only been about a month into my second relapse. Have any of you been through this, and have you any advice?
26 posts and 11 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.352

I wish I wasn't a NEET, I wish I wasn't a Hikki,I wish I wasn't a gross abomination born in the wrong body, I wish I wasn't born to the wrong family in the wrong country in the wrong era in time… it's all wrong. And I never wanted any of it.

No.353

>>352
And yet, everyone suffers in this way, only our masks, lies, and "feel good" escapist coping mechanisms hide it from sight. We are just more honest people, that we show it.

No.441

I occasionally slip into non-reality and live in my imagination due to the isolation and free time. I don't know how much time has passed since I started hikkidom, almost a year? a year? Time just passes so quickly now and functioning normally seems only slightly possible

No.442

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I'm OP and >>347
Reading through this thread is so comfy. I'm working again and I have been enjoying it. It makes a big difference to be able to relate to your coworkers and be friends with them. Sure, it helps to live in an area with a lot of fellow weirdos. A few years ago, I never would have thought I'd come this far in overcoming my social anxiety. It does get easier to interact with people, and the physical human interaction has a profound impact on your mental health. We're all gonna make it anons.

No.443

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>>442
Glad to hear fren.


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No. 429 [Reply]

Anyone else doing this?

I know a lot of people are skeptical of any health benefits that could be gained from not wagglin your willly and idk if there are true health benefits myself, but I know for sure I am addicted to pornography and I want to stop. I have many personal reasons as to why I want to stop masturbating and watching porn.

So thoughts on nofap?
Tips and tricks to help fight the urge when it comes?

No.430

I don't know about health benefits and I can see it being a harm if you are used to jerking yourself more than once a day and then going to 0 for a long time.

It's certainly an act of self discipline though. If you manage to hold this for a whole month I'm sure you'll find the will and energy to do other things like study or medidate.

Best of luck anon.

No.432

>>430
I'm also of the opinion that it's more of an exercise in self-control than anything. I personally fap a few times a day even though I, "don't want to." but it definitely saps my motivation after I'm done.

My only cure is to keep busy, but even working 12 hours a day isn't busy enough, so honestly it's really hard for me to go more than a couple days without coming across some anime grill thumbnail that boils my oil.


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